December 16, 2013

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Hello my lovely readers,

I hope all of you got a glimpse at my paradise experience in Costa Rica and enjoyed reading it, just as much as I enjoyed capturing the moments. Reminiscing my getaway aloud me to step away from #OOTD post and dabble in travel blogging. It gives you guys a chance to see other aspects of my life experiences . Writing alone is my main passion. However, writing fashion and beauty tips to make women feel beautiful in their own skin only inspire me. Constantly receiving compliments on my style or makeup pushed me to create a blog and begin my portfolio.

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Photography By: John Tran

 

Recently I’ve been conflicted with my future, dreams and goals. With finishing this semester, I only have three classes  left towards my Associate of Arts degree. The question on which University to transfer to troubles me. The question on how to survive New York City’s cut throat fashion industry, or if that’s even the path I’m destined to take keeps me up late at night. I’ve been pondering on so many options and speaking to so many uncertain people.

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Yet these are questions parents help children get through. These are late night discussions I would talk my mom’s ear off. Things are always easier when you have your mom, sibling or friend to help guide you. But in my case, my best friend/mother is now my guardian angel. Many of you may have heard somethings or nothing at all. Tomorrow will mark her third year death- anniversary. When I was a freshman in college, Fall semester of 2013 my mother got unexpectedly ill and seven weeks of fighting in the hospital she passed away from such an intense organism she picked up by vacationing in Mexico. When we came back from Mexico, she began to deal with vertigo (imbalance/ dizziness in the brain). After checking into a hospital, two days later she encountered such a traumatic seizure it completely destroyed the brain. By her being so young and healthy, aside from the sudden sickness the body fell into a comatic state. Leaving her there to fight for her life or willow away. To this day, we still do not know what attacked my mom’s body or what she picked up in Mexico. On December 16th, 2013 my mom passed away at 6:50 pm.

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Since that day my life changed all together. There is never anything anyone can say to make the pain go away. “Time heals all wounds” does not exist. If anything as time goes  by it only gets harder. To know my mom won’t physically be there when I graduate college, get married, or have kids. She will only be looking down from heaven. One day we will meet again just like we meet in my dreams. Tomorrow marking her third year anniversary opens my eyes at how quickly time flies. This experience has taught me many things one to ALWAYS appreciate the loved ones around you. You literally never know when your last touch or conversation will be. 26

It’s be a long road to recovery and I’m still not 100% healed. After rebelling against my family and finally attending therapy , I will never be the girl I once was. But I have learned to be just as strong as my mom was and to fight my way through life. Pursuing my dreams in writing whether it’s in the fashion industry or not. I know God will reveal his plan and purpose eventually. I have learned to smile through the up’s and the downs and to love myself for who I am.

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I wanted to share a personal experience with my readers vs. the superficial makeup and clothes, I constantly write about. I wanted to post something raw and real. I only hope by sharing my story it inspires others as my mom inspires me to keep living and succeeding each day.

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“My Dreams Will Become My Reality” 

Get The Look

Phone Case// Kimoji

Sunglasses// Fendi

Crop Nude// Kendall & Kylie (Pac Sun)

Bralette // Victoria Secret

Denim// Brandy Melville

Shoes//Forever 21

Backpack// Nine West

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6 thoughts on “December 16, 2013

  1. Sabrina

    This was beautiful but sad at the same time. Your mom is still your biggest fan. She is your angel watching over you. I wish you all the very best. Hope to see you soon!!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Ms D

    Just do YOU. You know who you are even if you wander down the side streets taking a detour off the highway of life. Your mom is in your heart and will always guide you. Trust your heart; it will never let you down! Love you!!

    Liked by 1 person

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